Out of my system
by galixe-2006
Summary: Jude can't keep working like this.She can no longer deal with the lust between her and Tommy knowing that they cannot be together.But,now she has a plan,a proposition for Tommy.One night together and her word that no one will find out.Will he except and l
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Instant Star or any of its characters.**

JUDE POV

I stood there staring up at the only window that still had a light on out of the whole apartment complex. It was the 7th floor, room 444. I had never actually been there, only in

my dreams.I had stolen the address from Sadie; it wasn't like she needed it anymore. She and Tommy had been broken up for months now and there was no chance of them

getting back together. The rain was steadily coming faster and faster, but still I didn't move or run for cover. I let the rain poor over my body. I didn't know what actually possessed

me to come tonight. Perhaps I had finally reached a breaking point. That was exactly what happened. I could no longer take it. I had been sitting on my bed, once again writing a

song that was inspired by Tommy. I was tired of it, tired of it all. Tired of the pain, the hurt, the anger,and the lust.I couldn't stand being so close to Tommy and not being able to

touch him. It wasn't fair. From the beginning we had been attracted to each other. And it didn't help that we were constantly together for hours alone in the studio. God that studio!

I have had so many fantasies that involved that studio. There were always looks, innocent touches; well that's how they appeared to everyone else. But I know, I could see it in his

eyes every time he looked at me, the looks were smoldering, filled with passion and lust, and a promise to take me to more pleasurable heights than I had ever known. Those were

the looks I lived for, because those were the looks that proved to me that he craved me just as much as I craved him. And there was the kiss. Oh yes, my friends, there was a kiss.

On my 16th birthday, the way he had kissed me that night was only a teaser of the pleasure he could give me. I cursed her parents over and over for not having me a few years

earlier. Things would be so much simpler then, but no, I had to be only 17, while he was 25. Tonight that was all going to change though. I was going to make him a proposition.

We both wanted each other, but we both also new the consequences that would be incurred if we were together and found out. So I was offering him tonight, no strings attached.

No one would know but us. I wasn't sure if he would actually agree to it or not, but I planned on putting up a good fight. I took a deep breath. This was it. I walked to the entrance

of the apartments, took one last look around me and walked through the doors. As I walked into the complex I looked at her surroundings. The inside was not what you would

have expected after seeing the outside, and from the looks, I assumed you had to have a lot of money to live in a place like this. I made my way over to the elevator, pushed the

floor number and held my breath as the elevator made its climb up the building. There was no way I was backing out of this. I needed this, I needed him. The elevator chimed as it

reached its destination. I walked out and stopped at his door. This was it, there was no turning back. I knocked twice on the door and took a step back as I heard him make his

way to the door.

TOMMY POV

God what was I supposed to do? I never should have started producing her. Yeah, that's it! I will go to Georgia tomorrow and tell her that I quit. I sighed in defeat. Whatever.

Therewas no way I would ever stop producing her. I could never be away from her. I guess I am some kind of sadist. I like putting myself through torture. And that's what it is.

Torture! It was torture working with her ever day in such close proximities and not being able to touch her or hold her. I want her so bad it hurts. There has got to be something

wrong with me. I was lusting after a 17 year-old. I leaned back on the couch and closed my eyes. She was always there. No matter what I am doing, she is always on my mind. I

pictured myself running my hands through her hair. God that hair, I groaned. "Okay; stop." I told myself out loud. I was getting up to go the kitchen when I heard a knock at the

door. What the fuck? It was almost 2 in the morning. I made my way over to the door. I opened it and was surprised to find the object of my frustration standing there. "Jude?" I

asked.

JUDE POV

I watched as the door was slowly opened and light poured out of the room into the dimly lit hallway. "Jude," he asked me in bewilderment. He took in my disheveled

appearance. I knew I had to look rough. I was soaked to the bone, and the only thing covering my body was a long leather coat. Although it had been a spur of the moment

decision to come here, I had planned it well. The jacket was long enough to cover just above my knees, no one could tell if I was actually wearing anything underneath it or not. I'm

not. "Hey Tommy, can I come in? I need to talk to you." He moved away from the door, a signal for me to enter. I hid a small grin as I brushed past him. "Step one complete," I

mentally told myself. I took in the room quickly. It was nice…and he had good taste. He walked past me and took a seat on a couch. He motioned for me to also sit. I sat across

from him. I sat there just watching him as he did the same, not quite ready to indulge him in the reason why I was there. But curiosity got the best of him. I laughed to myself.

Tommy hated guessing games. "Why are you here Jude," he asked. He was nervous. I could here it in his voice. I was nervous too, but I wouldn't let him know that I took a deep

breath, this was it. "Okay Tommy, I am here for one reason and for one reason only," I watched as one eyebrow lifted in question. "And what might that be?" "I'm here to fuck." I

said it as simply as if it was nothing out of the ordinary, as if I was telling him that it was in fact raining outside. He sat there, frozen. I looked at the clock on the wall and waited

patiently as five whole minutes went by. I had to admit to that he deserved the time to come to grips with what I had just said, but five minutes with out a word, I almost began to

wonder if he had went comatose. Then he laughed. This wasn't the regular chuckle this was an all out laugh. He was practically rolling on the floor. He was blatantly laughing at me.

I saw nothing funny in the matter; to me this was a matter of life and death, not something to joke about. Okay so maybe it wasn't actually that serious, but still, he was laughing at

me. It wasn't as if I went around saying things like this all the time. "That was good Jude, but seriously why are you here?" When he noticed that I still wasn't laughing he suddenly

went quiet. "You're serious?" He asked astonished. "Deadly," I stated. That was when he stood. He looked at me. He ran a hand through his hair. "No. Jude you need to go. Now!

It's late, and you should be in bed. And we are most certainly not," he paused, looking deeply at me again, "fucking as you so colorfully put it." I stood too. "I am not going

anywhere. Not until you listen to what I have to say." I protested. "Jude, no, this is not happening…there is not anything you can say to change my mind. We are not having sex." I

knew then thatI was going to have to go to plan B. "Tommy, you know you want me. You need this, you need me," I stated confidently.

TOMMY POV

I didn't answer at first. Was she fucking crazy? I never in a million years expected those words to come out of her mouth. Although she was right, I did want her,there was no

way I could have sex with her. For so many reasons; one she was jailbait and two I'm her producer. Both of our jobs would be on the line. "It doesn't matter what I want Jude. It's

not going to happen." She smiled. "But you admit that you want me?" "You already know the answer to that girl." It came out in a ragged whisper. I walked towards her, but

stopped when I came within touching distance. I started to raise my hand to cup her cheek, but quickly dropped it again. I couldn't take the chance. I listened as she went on and

on about why we should have sex. "Tommy, one night together; no one will ever know but us. We both need it. We need to get rid of the tension between us. It just keeps getting

worse and worse. And I can't keep working like this. I need you out of my system." She was pleading with me. I knew she was right. I wanted her. I wanted her more than I had

ever wanted another girl. And the thought was more tempting then sin, but I can't do it, I can't let myself. I looked her in the eyes. "No Jude. It can't happen.There are way to

many things standing in the way.Now, you really need to go." With a defeated sigh she turned towards the door. I turned the other way. I couldn't watch as she walked out, as I let

her walk out on what was likely a once in a lifetime opportunity.

JUDE POV

As I reached the door I turned once more towards him. I was not giving up that easily. "Oh Tommy, there was one more thing." He quickly turned. "Yeah," he asked. His eyes

followed my hands every move. I reached up to the top of the jacket, to the top button. Slowly I slipped the first button through the hole. I wanted to laugh as his eyes nearly

bugged out of his head, as all of the buttons to the jacket came undone. As the last button came undone he looked into my eyes. He couldn't say anything, he was too shocked.

Never breaking eye contact, I slowly let the jacket fall to the ground. There I stood, in all my naked glory, well except for the black combat boots. I slowly made my way towards

him.

TOMMY POV

She really had lost her mind. I didn't know what to expect when she told me there was one more thing she had to say but I wasn't expecting a strip. I was unable to say

anything as the buttons came undone. I could do nothing but watch as the Jacket slowly slipped to the floor. Oh jeez she was naked. God she's beautiful. I looked at her. What else

was I supposed to do? I let my gaze run over her body. She had the body of a goddess.She looked so softand thoselegsthat went on for days. God those legs, they could rap

around me and….Damnit .Jude." The words came out in a harsh whisper. She couldn't do this to me. Oh god, and now she's walking towards me. Tommy, don't do anything you

are going to regret. I told myself over and over. I quickly put my hands behind my back. She was now standing right in front of me. He breasts were touching my chest. I groaned. I

wanted nothing more that to take her right then. But my shock for the evening was not over. I was just about to say something when she reached up and pulled my head down to

hers.

**Okay so what did you think? I know its going to take a while to get off, but I had this in my mind and I needed to get it out.**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Instant Star or any of its characters.

JUDE POV

We were kissing. Okay, well I was kissing him. He really hadn't moved. My lips moved over his slowly. Lightly I ran my tongue over his lips, begging him to open. His lips parted

slightly. God, this was heaven. I was so immersed in the kiss that I was shocked when he forcefully pushed me away from him.

TOMMY POV

She was kissing me. Jude Harrison was kissing me. I wanted to kiss her back, I willed myself to, but for some reason I couldn't make my lips move. They parted slightly when she

ran her tongue over my lips. It registered in my head what was happening. Not meaning to be so rough, I grabbed her arms and pushed her away from me. I held her at arms

distance. She was breathing hard. "What do you think you are doing Jude?" I asked. "What does it look like I'm doing?" She said back as if I was stupid. I shook my head at her.

She really was crazy. But then again I admired her for going after what she wanted. "Tommy, one night! It won't change anything; well it might make things better. No one will

know. And tomorrow, I will walk out that door, and it will be as if nothing ever happened." She pleaded. I wanted her so bad right now. I was losing the battle. How was I

supposed to say no to the girl I wanted more than anything who was offering herself to me? I looked at her. Once again, I looked over her body. My eyes rested on her breasts.

Her nipples were erect. They were begging to be touched. The white flag went up in my mind. I had lost. Jude would not be leaving my apartment that night. I walked slowly

toward her. She gasped as I started pushing her backwards slowly, my eyes never leaving hers. When her back rested against the door I looked into her eyes. She actually looked

scared. But behind the fear, I could see all the lust and passion in her eyes. If she wanted to fuck, we were going to fuck. My lips came crashing down on hers. Instantly my tongue

raked against her teeth, begging for her to open. Each of us battling for dominance, are mouths fused together.

JUDE POV

I stood there still breathing hard. He hadn't said anything for a while. I was actually afraid that he was going to tell me to leave again. As he slowly started walking me backwards I

figured he was kicking me out himself. My back rested against the door. Before I knew what was happening his lips were pressing roughly against mine. My mind was doing a little

victory dance. I had won. My mouth opened to him, and his tongue swept inside.

TOMMY POV

The moment she opened her mouth to me I was lost. Our mouths were melded together. Her arms at some point had made there way around my neck. My hands instantly grabbed

her hips. Her naked hips! I tore my mouth away from hers. Both breathing hard I could do nothing but stare at her. I watched as her chest heaved up and down with each breath

she took. I realized then that my hands were still on her hips, slowly needing the soft skin beneath my fingers. Her eyes were clouded over in passion. Passion I had created. I

groaned and once again my lips claimed hers. After kissing for a few moments, my lips moved to her neck, slowly placing kisses across her jaw bone as I went. I knew I would end

up leaving a mark on her neck. I was roughly sucking and biting on her neck, it seemed the harder I bit, the louder she moaned, and the louder she moaned the harder I squeezed

her hips. I admitted to myself that I wanted to leave a mark on her. If this was the only time I had with her I wanted her to remember. And remember she would, because every time

she looked in the mirror, she would see the marks.

JUDE POV

I knew what the fucker was doing, he was leaving a mark on me, and he was doing it on purpose. I knew then that I was going to be doing some major make-up cover-ups for the

next few days. His mouth was hot against my neck, but the real pleasure came from the motions he was making against my hips. My hands clenched and unclenched against his

shoulders with each bite he left on my neck. Unconsciously I began pushing myself into him, creating a friction between us that would soon take Tommy overboard. As I continued

to rub against him his hands moved from my hips and he rested them on the small of my back, pressing me even harder into him.

TOMMY POV

As she began thrusting against me I almost lost it. This was going to be a fast fuck, I could already tell, but the faster the fuck, the more times it could be done before she had to go.

My lips once again met hers in a searing kiss. Instantly her mouth opened to me. My hands made a slow trail the rest of the way down her back and I squeezed her butt and

pressed her higher against me. She knew what I was asking for and grabbed my shoulders as I grabbed behind both of her thighs and lifted her against me, her legs wrapping tightly

around my waist. When she was situated against me she raised her head. The way she was breathing turned me on even more. Her chest was in perfect view. My mouth instantly

lowered, lightly running my tongue over her breast she quivered. After spending equal time on each side of her chest I turned around and began the walk to my room. On the way

there my shirt was discarded of, her hands were running over my chest, lightly scraping her nails as she went. I shivered beneath her touch. I laid her down on the bed and quickly

rid myself of the rest of my clothes. She had moved her way up the bed. I watched her a few moments before climbing on the bed. Her hair was spread out across the pillow. Her

eyes were halfway closed. She fit there perfectly, in my bed, as if she were made for it, as if she was made for me. I moved over her, my lips once again returning to her neck. I

breathed in her scent, it was addicting. I rested my head on her shoulder, "God, Jude, what are you doing to me?" I managed to rasp out. I lifted my head and rested it on her

forehead, lightly I kissed her lips. She smiled at me. I ran my hand along the length of her body, when I reached her belly-button she sucked in a deep breath. Slowly I moved my

hand through the soft hair between her thighs.

JUDE POV

Nothing would register in my head. I could feel nothing over the throbbing sensation between my legs. It became even more so persistent as his hands made their way down my

body. On a will of their own, my legs opened. My body jerked up as he ran a finger down my slit. My eyes met his; he was staring hard at me, watching each facial expression I

made as he continued to rub his finger against me. I lifted my head and kissed him. Slowly he inserted a finger in me. After moving it in and out of me a few times he inserted a

second one. Something was building inside of me, something that needed to be let out. I started bucking my hips against his hand, moans escaping my lips.

TOMMY POV

I couldn't believe how wet she already was, when I inserted my fingers into her. As she started thrusting against my hand, I slowed down the temp at which I was fingering her. She

was so tight against my fingers. I pulled my hand away and carefully guided my dick to her pussy. I rubbed it up and down against her, letting the wetness cover me. She bucked

wildly against me. Slowly I entered her, when I could push no farther without force I looked at her. I knew she was a virgin, but I had never really thought about it. At the thought

that I would be her first I was thrilled, in a way, she would always belong to me now. "Jude, I'm sorry, but this is going to hurt." She nodded her head and shut her eyes, she gripped

my shoulders tightly. With a deep thrust I broke her. She screamed out in pain, I didn't move. I watched the flash of pain move across her face. As a tear rolled down her cheek I

softly kissed her lips again. She fit me perfectly. I assumed the pain had subsided because she slowly moved against me. I groaned. I lifted my hips and thrust back into her. I

repeated that motion over and over; she started to raise her hips against me. As she finally got the hang of it I moved faster in and out of her. It didn't take me long before I was

ready to cum, she was ready too. I felt her tighten around me and the shivers run down her body. I slammed into her once more before I finally let myself go. As the orgasm

subsided I collapsed on top of her. I knew I was probably squishing her, but I really couldn't move. Her arms wrapped around me, they moved across my back in slow patterns.

When I little bit of strength was returned to me I rose up to pull out of her and move off of her she protested. I laughed.

JUDE POV

That was the best thing I had ever felt in my entire life, nothing could compare. As he fell against me I wrapped my arms around him. I listened as he tried to get his breathing under

control. When he tried moving away from me I tightened my grip against him. He laughed and I looked at him. "Here wait a second," he said. He pulled away from me and rolled to

his side, he wrapped his hands around me and pulled me against him, my head resting on his shoulder. Against my will, my eyes closed, and I fell asleep.

TOMMY POV

As her breathing became regular again I knew she had fallen asleep. I laid there thinking. I couldn't believe that I had just had sex with Jude. It was better than I ever could have

imagined. I ran my hand through her hair. I looked across the room at the digital clock on the wall. It was 3:00 am. Jude would be leaving in a few hours. At that thought I pulled her

tighter against me. I didn't know how I was supposed to let her walk out that door. I should have known that this would only make things worse; I should have known that after

having her once I would never want to let her go. But I did have to let her go. I had to let her go back to her normal life. Back to her parents, who would have me arrested and

thrown in jail if they knew what their daughter and her producer were doing; back to her boyfriend, speed. Anger instantly rose inside me. I had dealt with Jude and Speed being

together because I had had to. I knew I still had to deal with it, but the thought of any other guy touching her now that I had loved her made me sick with rage. Call me crazy, or

possessive, but I suddenly had the urge to wake her up and start all over again. I wanted to claim her again. I wanted to fuck her as many times as it took to make her see me every

time she closed her eyes. I wanted it to be me she saw as she was kissing her boyfriend. And that is exactly what I did. Around 5 in the morning we finally called it a night. She

rested against me once again instantly falling asleep. I closed my eyes and right before I fell asleep I whispered the words that I would never be able to tell Jude while she was

awake. "I love you girl, more than you will ever know." She snuggled deeper against me. I kissed her forehead and fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Instant Star or any of its characters.

Hello...sorry, I know this is a really short chapter but I figured I should get something out. I promise this next chapter will be longer and something will actually happen in it. LOL

Jude Pov

As I wavered in between sleep and consciousness I was vaguely aware of a comforting pressure against my body. Finally I let my eyes drift open. I was greeted with the sight of a

white wall and a couple of pictures spread out across it. This was not my room. I moved my hands up to my eyes and rubbed them, trying to bring everything in to clearer focus. As

I moved, the pressure around my body increased. I carefully rolled on to my back. I smiled at the sight that greeted me. Tommy. All of last night's events played over through my

head. I blushed at the memory of the things we had done. I looked at his face. He looked like a little boy when he slept. His face was relaxed, not at all serious the way he looked at

work. I lightly ran my hand across his forehead brushing his hair from over his eyes. He stirred, but still did not open his eyes. I looked at the clock across the room. It was 7:00 am.

I had to be at G-Major in less than an hour and I still had to go home and get some clothes. After carefully extracting my body from his, I stood up and walked around to his side of

the bed. He had rolled on to his back when I moved. I sat at the edge of the bed. I rested my hand on his, running my thumb across his knuckles. This was going to be the hardest

thing I had ever done in my life. How was I supposed to leave him and pretend that nothing had happened? A smile spread across my face when I remembered the last thing he said

to me before I drifted off to sleep. I knew I probably wasn't supposed to have heard, but I did, and I reveled in the revelation, knowing that I would probably never hear those

words again. Tommy loved me; he had admitted it when he thought I had been asleep. I stood up and leaned across him; I pressed my lips to his head and then moved the down

close to his ear. I whispered, "I love you Tommy. I always have." As I made my way out his door I looked back one last time. I could do this. I hoped. I walked into the living

room put on my jacket and boots, left his apartment, and made my way home. It was time to get back to the real world; the world which did not include sleeping with her producer,

the world where she had a boyfriend who was totally in love with her.

Tommy Pov

I was awake even before she was. I laid there just holding her watching the second on the clock tick by. Everything that had happened the night before replayed in my mind over

and over. I knew the second she woke up, her body gave and involuntary jerk. I wasn't sure if I should let her know I was also awake. I wasn't sure if she would feel awkward or

fell regret for what had happened the night before. I didn't take the chance. When she rolled over I closed my eyes. I could feel her eyes on me. She stayed that way for a few

minutes before finally getting out of bed and then sitting down next to me. As her hand brushed my forehead I wanted to open my eyes. I wanted to see her face. I wanted to grab

her, flip her back on to the bed and move on top of her again. But I knew I couldn't. I knew that if I touched her one more time, I would never be able to let her go. The thought

played over and over in my head. Would that be such a bad thing; to never let her go? It wasn't fair to her. I had to let her go. She kissed my forehead and I had to use all the

restraint I could muster not to shiver at her touch. When she leaned down and whispered in her I was shocked at what she said. She loved me. Tommy no, you can not do it. You

have to let her go. It's for the best, my mind kept telling me. So ignoring my heart I listened as she walked out of my room and out of the apartment. When I heard the door to the

apartment close I opened my eyes. Not really thinking about it I went through the motions of getting ready for work. In less than an hour I would be back in the studio with Jude. I

got in the shower and began washing my body and hair. A memory flashed in my mind of Jude and me. We were about to start again. All the times before had been fast and rough;

this time we took it slow. I remembered right before she came she had opened her eyes and they locked with mine. As she rode the wave of ecstasy her eyes never left mine. When

the memory was through I took a deep breath. I rested my head against the wall of the shower and let the water run over my body. I couldn't handle this. I cried out in anguish and

hit my hand against the wall; a lone tear fell from my eye.

Jude Pov

When I entered G-Major an hour later I was unsure what to expect. I passed by Georgia and smiled. Remember Jude, you have to act like nothing happened. "Morning Jude," she

said. I said it back and made my way into the kitchen. I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and began rummaging around in the cabinets to find something to eat. I heard

someone enter the room behind me but didn't turn around to see who it was. I felt the person closing in on me but still I didn't turn around. Was it Tommy? I was afraid to look.

When the person was right behind me a hand wrapped around my waist and I was pulled against a hard body. Oh my god, it was. "What are you doing?" I whispered in a panic.

"What I'm not allowed to hug my girlfriend?" I turned around quickly. "Speed?" It came out like a question. "You were expecting someone else?" He joked. I laughed. "No, I was

just surprised is all." He leaned down and before I could turn my head he pressed his lip to mine. Jude he is your boyfriend. I had to tell myself that over and over, because in truth I

was repulsed by it now. I felt like I was betraying Tommy. At the thought of him I moaned. I guess Speed thought it was for him because he started kissing me harder. A picture of

Tommy last night was placed in the front of my mind. Was it bad to be thinking of someone else while kissing your boyfriend? I guess I got caught up in the kiss, imagining it was

Tommy and not Speed, because we were both startled apart as someone cleared their throat. I quickly looked up. I wish I hadn't. It was Tommy. He looked pissed. I took a step

back from Speed and looked at the ground. I watched as Tommy's feet slowly made their way closer to us. "Sorry to break up the love fest, but I need my artist in the studio now,"

he said to Speed. His voice was deadly calm. "Sure, no problem buddy. Later baby," he said as he kissed me on the cheek. I didn't say anything as he made his way out of the

room.

Tommy Pov

I was already in the Studio when Jude arrived. I was afraid to talk to her, so I didn't come out and greet her. I watched as she said hello to Georgia and walked into the kitchen. I

also saw Speed follow closely behind her. Jealousy hit me. I couldn't help it I followed after both of them. When I got to the door I was glued to the spot. Jude and Speed were

wrapped up in a passionate kiss. I heard her moan and rage ripped through my body. That should have been me. Only I could make her moan that way. I couldn't stand it any

longer and cleared my throat. Jude looked scared as she looked at me. She should be. I wasn't sure I could talk to the idiot without saying something I would regret so in my

calmest voice, I pretty much told him to get lost, which left Jude and I alone. I looked at her. Her hair was still wet from the shower she obviously took after she got home. She

smelled like vanilla. I wanted nothing more than to grab her and breathe in her smell, but knew I couldn't. I looked into her eyes. She still looked scared. I felt bad. I instantly

softened. "Are you alright?" I asked. I could tell she was surprised. I guess she was expecting me to yell at her or something. "I'm fine." I knew just by asking if she was alright I was

breaking our agreement to pretend it never happened, but I couldn't help myself. "That's good. I was thinking we could finish writing that song today?" I asked her. She nodded and

walked past me out of the kitchen. I was stunned. She really was acting as if it hadn't happened. It made me mad that she could ignore what had happened so easily. If this is the

game she wanted to play then I would be a willing participant. I followed after her.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Instant Star.

Jude Pov

It had been a hectic week. I was busy finishing up my 3rd album, with loads of pressure from Georgia. She didn't mean to, and I know she meant well, but it was tiring. Speed and

I had broken up the day before. I guess he noticed that there was a difference in me. I had started avoiding him, and I guess he got the picture. The tension between Tommy and I

had grown and I was at a breaking point. The looks had become more frequent and the innocent touches had become longer. I wondered if everyone could see the lust in our eyes,

and the electricity that was between us. I was barely hanging on to my sanity. I wanted him again, but it was my idea, and no matter how hard, I would follow through with the

stipulations of the proposition. The night had not been mentioned once. But I knew that every time I looked into his eyes he was envisioning the night over again in his head. Hell, it

replayed in my mind every second of the day, even if I hadn't seen him. It was late. Around 1:00am. Kwest, Tommy and I had stayed to finish mixing a song. It was finally through.

I sat there in the sound room listing to the finished song. When it was over they both turned and looked at me. I smiled. "So what do you think?" Kwest asked. "I love it." "It sounds

really good girl." Tommy said. "You always say that." I joked. "It's always true." My eyes met his and lingered. Kwest cleared his throat and I dropped my gaze, lightly blushing.

"Okay, well I'm out guys." Kwest said as he stood up and began getting his things together. We said our goodbyes to him and he left. It was just Tommy and I left now. I stood up,

I was nervous. This was the first time that Tommy and I had been alone since the night at his house. I went and picked up my jacket. When I turned around he was standing only

inches from me I gasped.

Tommy Pov

I couldn't handle it anymore. After having her that one night, I wanted her again and again. I was at my end on trying to ignore the feelings. The night had not been mentioned once,

just like she said. I watched her throughout the week. Memories were constantly flooding my mind, pictures of her while in the throws of passion. I groaned just thinking about it. I

was vaguely aware of Kwest leaving. Jude and I were alone. I could tell she was nervous. She began moving around the room. Before I knew what I was doing I moved behind

her. When she turned around it was almost too much to have her that close to me. My arm, which was at first resting by my side, began to move up. I stopped myself. What in the

hell was I doing. This could not happen again. She gasped and I stared at her. We stared at each other for what felt like hours which was in all actuality only seconds. I wanted to

grab her and press my mouth to hers, to her whole body. In a frustrated sigh I threw my hands in the air and turned my back to her. Why was I doing this to myself? I hear her walk

towards me and I flinched when I felt her hand on my shoulder. "What's wrong?" She asked. What's wrong? You really want to know? I am dying to fuck your brains out again. I

want you screaming my name over and over as I make you cum. I wanted to yell at her. I turned towards her. She looked afraid. I took a step back from her, putting a little

distance between us. "Nothing's wrong." I told her softly. "Come on…I'll take you home." I told her. I watched as she walked back over to the couch. She bent down a little to

pick up her jacket. When she grabbed it she turned to look at me. "It's killing you isn't it?" She asked. What was she talking about? "Huh?" "It's killing you being this close to me

and not being able to touch me." I stared at her in disbelief. What was she doing? She had just broken the proposition; the night we spent together had just been mentioned. I

wasn't sure what I should say to that. She walked towards me and sat he jacket on the back of a chair that was next to me. Again she looked at me. As she lifted her hand closer to

my chest I froze. What in the hell was she doing? My heart started beating faster and faster, my breaths came out in short gasps. She lightly pulled on the collar of my shirt lowering

my head to hers. She moved her mouth to my ear and lightly whispered, "I know exactly how you feel. I know we're not supposed to talk about it, but I can't help it. I know exactly

how you feel because every time I see you I want nothing more than to be back in your room, with nothing between us but the sweat from our bodies." As she let go of my shirt, she

gently bit my ear. After that she moved past me and walked out the door. I stood there a second, my mouth wide open. I was out the door and after her in a flash. Hey, she broke

the agreement when she mentioned the night we were together. Anything could happen now. Trying to make myself not feel so guilty, Even though it was childish, the phrase "She

started it," ran through my head. She was almost to the entrance of G-Major when I caught up to her. With out a second thought I reached my arm out and grabbed hers. She

turned around quickly and just stared at me, waiting for me to do something. I couldn't take it anymore. I pulled her to me roughly and pushed her against the wall, pressing my

body against hers. She gasped at the contact.

My hands went to her waist, gripping her tightly. Looking at her once more, my lips crashed down on hers.

Jude Pov

I couldn't help it. I had to mention that night. I needed to know that he remembered it too. As I whispered in his ear I could feel him shiver. I smiled at the affect I had on him. After

I released my hold on his shirt I made my way out the door. I really didn't expect what had happened next. Before I knew what was happening I was being pressed against the

wall, Tommy's lips covering mine. I wasn't complaining though. I readily kissed him back. As his tongue ran over mine I moaned and leaned into him; my arms wrapping around his

neck. For lack of oxygen he pulled away. I let my head rest against the wall, trying to get my breathing back under control. Tommy stood there watching me.

Tommy Pov

The moment my lips touched hers again I was lost. I knew I shouldn't be kissing her but I couldn't help it. The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. "Come back

to my place?" I begged. She didn't say anything only nodded her agreement. I told her to wait while I went and shut everything off in the office, grabbing her jacket out of the sound

room I walked back to her. Without saying a word I grabbed her hand, intertwining our fingers and led her outside and to my car. The ride back to my house was silent.

Kwest Pov

I wasn't sure what it was, but I knew something had changed between Jude and Tommy. They had been acting strange, well more strange than usual that is. Although I should have

expected it, I was unprepared for what I saw. I had gotten halfway home when I realized I had left my cell phone in the sound room. I figured Tommy and Jude had left by then and

was surprised to find his viper still outside, and the lights still on inside the building. I had made it to the door and looked inside where I saw Jude rushing down the hall, Tommy

following quickly after. I was just about to open the door when Tommy suddenly grabbed Jude and pressed her against the wall. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. They were

kissing. Not knowing what else to do, I made my way back to my car and parked around the corner, waiting for them to leave before I made my way inside and grabbed my cell

phone. I smiled to myself. It was about time those two hooked up. I knew from the beginning that Tommy had been into her, and vice versa, but I also knew how Tommy was; he

never let anyone it his life. I also knew that I couldn't tell anyone what I saw; it would mean big problems for everyone. I got back into my car and made my way home. I was

happy for them both; I only hoped they knew what they were doing. I hoped they were being careful.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Instant Star

Jude Pov

We hadn't lasted a week. The night in the studio, where Tommy asked me to go back to his place, was the night that our illicit love affair began. We hadn't even made it to his

apartment, in fact, we were only in the elevator, when passions overcame us, and we could no longer deny the feelings of lust between us. The minute the doors closed he had me

pinned against the wall, his mouth covering mine, while his hands moved up and down my body. I was helpless to the onslaught of feelings that hit me when his hands touched me. I

simply groaned, wrapped my arms around his neck, and kissed him back harder than ever before. His mouth moved from my lips and he placed kisses down my jaw to my neck.

He was whispering something between each kiss, but I was to gone to understand what was being said. As the elevator climbed higher he wrapped his hands around my thighs

lifting me up as to place my legs around his waist. Once this was done, he once again pushed me into the wall, pushing himself into me. He was wearing a button up shirt, and within

seconds I was hastily trying to open them. When I had managed to get halfway down, I grew to frustrated and ripped the rest of them off; tossing the shirt aside. I inwardly laughed

at the question that would be asked when the next person entered the elevator after noticing all of the buttons. My hands moved across his chest, I moved my head down to his

neck. I bit down gently and he pressed harder into me. I kissed my way up his neck to his ear and began nibbling on it. With each shudder from him I became more and more

aware of the throbbing between my legs. I began moving against him. The bells dinged, signaling they were on his floor. As we turned around we were surprised to see an old

woman standing there, mouth hanging wide open, she was as pale as a ghost. I blushed furiously; Tommy tried to stifle a laugh. I buried my head in his shoulder and told him to go.

Now! We never even made it to the bed. The minute he opened the door we were laying on the carpet, clothes were scattered around us in various places. And I knew with more

and more certainty, after each thrust, I was going to have carpet burn from hell. Oh well it was worth it.

Tommy Pov

I laid there in bed 2 months later, Jude sleeping quietly in my arms. I smiled as memories of the night I asked her to come back to my place flooded my mind. After the elevator

incident we had quickly went to my place and proceeded to finish what we had started. We had finally made it to my bedroom, about 3 times later. We had just called it a night,

when Jude turned to me, asking me the one question even I didn't have the answer to. "What do we do now?" "Jude, we can't…" she cut me off before I could finish. "I know this

wasn't supposed to happen again. But this just proves that we can't be apart." She was right. "Jude, your 17." I stated. "Yeah, but I will be 18 in 4 months." "Girl, that is in 4

months, we're talking about right now. This is illegal." I told her. "So what, you just want to try and stay away from each other again. Look how well that worked this time. You

know what, fine. We will stay away from each other, but just know, somebody is going to have to keep me satisfied." She sat up and began to walk out of the bedroom, I jumped

out of the bed, grabbed her by the waist, and while she screamed and kicked, carried her back to the bed, and moved over her, pinning her to the bed. "Like hell you're going to

find someone else. You are mine, and only mine." What the fuck was she thinking? She was mine no one could have her but me. I softened my tone, "We can make this work Jude.

We just have to be careful. No one can find out. And on your 18th birthday, we will tell everyone we are together, no more secrets. Okay?" I hoped I was doing the right thing.

When I seen the smile on her face, whether I did the right thing or not was the farthest thing from my mind; I was happy as long as she was. I drifted off to sleep, pressing her tighter

into me.

Jude Pov

When Tommy said that we would make it official on my 18th birthday I couldn't have been happier. He wanted to be with me, for real. All I had left was 2 months. I wrapped my

arms around his neck and lifted up slightly and pressed my lips to his. He kissed me back softly. It wasn't a hard fast kiss like all of our previous ones. This one was slow, and

tender. That was also the night we made love for the first time. There was no reason to rush, we had the whole night, and the rest of the nights that followed. It hasn't been an easy

task keeping it from everyone. And sometimes I wondered if Kwest actually knew. There were just days when I could feel him watching Tommy and I.

Tommy Pov

We were at our 3 month anniversary and things were going well, no one suspected anything was going on between Jude and me. Well except for Kwest maybe, but there was really

no telling with that guy. We had been given the week off; Jude and I that is. Darius sent us down to the farm; he wanted a new #1 hit from Jude. We readily agreed. The more time

alone we had together the better. The song was written the first day we arrived. But we didn't let Darius know that or he would make us return. We spent the week, doing all of the

things that normally we could not have done because we were always being watched. We were able to go out to restaurants and to the movies. We even went on a picnic. We had

gone out on the horses. Jude said there was a place she wanted to show me. I had been to the farm before. It seemed so long ago now, back when he thought he had feelings for

Sadie. As I followed behind her, I noticed that there was an opening in the woods. She turned around and smiled at me; my cue to move beside her. It was beautiful. There were

wild flowers everywhere, surrounding a pond. The pond was clear; you could literally count the stones at the bottom. As the day went on it became hotter and hotter and we

decided to go for a swim. We ended up making love there in the pond. After drying off we laid down on the blanket, letting the sun run over our bodies. She was lying on her back;

I was on my side, my hand running through her hair. She had never looked more beautiful. The sun was glistening off of her hair, she had her eyes closed. I could do nothing but

watch her. I thought she had fallen asleep. I kissed her forehead. Cupping her cheek gently I brushed my thumb across her lips. "I love you Jude." I whispered. I kissed her lips

softly and rolled to my back, closing my eyes. "I love you to." I heard come from beside me. I turned my head over, she was watching me, and she had a smile on her face. I leaned

over and kissed her softly again. Grabbing her hand, I laid back down on my back, content to just lye there with her. She loved me. Who would have thought.

Jude Pov

It was the day before we were supposed to leave for back home. I was really dreading it. Tommy and I had grown even closer if that was possible. It was as if something had been

let out after we admitted our true feelings for each other. Tommy Quincy loved me. It still sent shivers down my body when he said it. When I had awoken that morning Tommy

was already out of bed. Feeling too lazy to get up and find him I laid there thinking. After about another hour and no sign of Tommy I stood up quickly, preparing to go find him. Big

mistake, the minute I stood I was overcome with a feeling of dizziness and nauseous. I instantly ran to the bathroom. I was barley at the toilet before last nights dinner was coming

back up. I hear Tommy come in at some point. He sat beside me whispering words of comfort, holding my hair away from my face. "Hey, baby, its ok, its going to be ok." He

whispered over and over. Something told me it wouldn't be. After I was sure that nothing else was coming up, Tommy carried me back to the bed, tucking me in. He sat down

beside me. "What could have made you sick?" "I'm not sure." "Well I am going to go to town and get you some soup. Is there anything else you need?" I thought about it for a

moment. "No, I'm good." He kissed me on the forehead and walked out the door, I fell back asleep.

Tommy Pov

I was really worried about her. I wondered what could have made her sick. I pulled into the grocery store and walked inside the store. I grabbed and basket and made my way up

and down the aisles. I was turning onto the canned items, when I was stopped in my tracks; a little boy, no older than 5 was standing there, holding a can. A woman I could only

assume to be his mother ran, over to him screaming at him to put it down. He looked frightened. I watched as he went to put the can back in its place, it accidentally slipped from

his fingers. The mother turned around, anger flashing through her eyes. She picked the can up and none to gently hit him upside his head. I cringed at the sight. The boy instantly

grabbed his head. "Don't you dare cry?" The mother screamed at him before she walked off. The boy turned and looked at me. His eyes were filled with sorrow; I almost wanted

to cry as I watched a tear fall from his eye. He quickly wiped it and followed his mother. I should have said something to her, it was wrong the way she treated him. But I knew that

it would probably only end up worse for the boy if I interfered. I stood there thinking. When I ever have children, they were never going to be hit. My father hit me as a child, and I

would not be like him. I smiled as I envisioned Jude, carrying around a tiny baby in her arms, our baby. As I shook the vision from my head I began my walk down the aisle. I

stopped mid-step. Oh my fucking god. With that thought I quickly got everything I needed, plus one thing that had not been on the list when I arrived and raced back to the farm.

She was still sleeping when I got home. I really didn't want to wake her, but this was serious. I sat down on the bed, gently I nudged her shoulder. "Jude, baby wake up." She

slowly opened her eyes. As I came into focus she smiled at me. "Hey." "Are you feeling any better?" "A little." "Jude I think there is something we need to talk about." She looked at

me confused and scared. "Jude I think I might know why you are sick." She raised up into a sitting position. "Why?" "Do you love me Jude?" I asked, I needed to hear her say it,

because once she found out what I thought was wrong with her she was likely to kill me. She didn't hesitate to answer. "Yes, more than anything, you know that. Why?" She said. I

could hear the fear and worry in her voice. I took a deep breath. "Jude, I think you might be pregnant with my child."


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Instant Star characters.

Jude Pov

I was unable to say anything. I was pregnant? There was no way I could be, was there? I have been on birth control since I was 16. It just wasn't possible. "Tommy, we can't be

having a baby. Can we?" I asked, tears stinging my eyes. He wrapped his arms around me and pressed my head against his shoulder. His hand ran over my back as he whispered

words in my ear. "Jude, it will be okay. We don't even know if you are. We should have been more careful. We shouldn't have just assumed that the birth control would keep you

protected." I listened to the words he spoke. Birth control was only 99 protective. So what, I was the unlucky 1. I took in a deep breath and lifted my head from his shoulder. I

lifted my head to his as he softly kissed me, reassuring me everything would be ok. I watched as he leaned down and grabbed something off the floor. It was a pregnancy test. I

shuddered as I looked at it.

Tommy Pov

I knew she was scared. Hell I was scared too. This was going to change both of our lives, and I wasn't sure if it was for the better. I handed her the test and she looked at me, her

eyes were wide with fear. I wished there was something I could do to take the fear away, but I knew there wasn't. "Here, why don't you go take this, I need to go make a few

phone calls." She nodded her head and made her way to the bathroom, I was surprised she didn't ask who I was calling. I walked out of the bedroom and downstairs, pulling out

my cell phone I walked out onto the patio. "Darius here." I took a deep breath. "Hey, D, its me Tommy." "Yo, Tommy, are you and Jude ready to come back with that number 1

song." The song was ready, but we weren't. "Actually that's the thing D. Jude got really sick this morning and she hasn't come out of the bathroom all day. I think she might be

coming down with a virus or something." There was a pause on the other end. "Get he ass in bed Tom, I don't need my number 1 artist getting sick and shit. Call me in a few days

and tell me how she is doing. Got it." If the situation hadn't been so serious I would have smiled, we had a few extra days. "Got it." I heard a click on the other end of the phone,

closed mine and let out a deep breath. She was pregnant. I knew I should've been hoping for the best, but it was just a feeling I had, she was pregnant. And I knew how she was.

She would keep it. Hell, I wouldn't giver her any other choice. I walked back into the house and sat down at the table, resting my head in my hands. What are we going to do?

What in the hell are we going to tell people. If they found out that Jude was pregnant, let alone pregnant by me, are lives were over. If only she was 18, then they couldn't do

anything about it. There was still 2 months until her birthday though and I assumed that she would be showing at anytime. I figured the child had been conceived the first night we

were together. I ran my hands through my hair, praying for an idea to come. It had been 30 minutes and figured the test would be done by now. I was making my way up the stairs

when the idea came. I ran the rest of the way up the stairs. When I entered the bathroom she was sitting on the floor holding he legs to her chest, her head resting on her knees.

Jude Pov

When the test turned positive I sunk to the floor. I tried thinking of all the possible outcomes, for when we told everyone. None of them turned out good in the end. Our lives were

surly over. As Tommy came into the bathroom I looked at him. I nodded my head slightly and listened as he took in a deep breath. He leaned down next to me, sitting beside me.

He grabbed my hand and squeezed it; I laid my head on his shoulder. We stayed that way for about an hour. Never talking, just listening to each other breath. I guess I fell asleep

because suddenly I was waking up and Tommy was putting me in bed. He started to walk away from the bed and I reached out and grabbed his hand. He turned and looked at

me. "Go to sleep Jude, you've had a tiring day." I nodded my head. He bent down and kissed my forehead. "I love you." He said. I smiled. I really needed to hear that. "I love you

too." Before he was out the door I was asleep again.

Tommy Pov

I left the farm. I needed out to get air. The idea I had come up with, I wasn't sure Jude would go for. But it was the only thing I could think of. The idea didn't seem that bad to me

though. I had already had it planned. Although we would have only been together about 5 months when she turned 18, I had planned on asking her to marry me. It was just getting

sped up a few months. I had wanted kids with Jude, but pictured them coming later in the marriage. But I could deal with this. Honestly I was actually kind of excited that she was

having my baby. I wondered if it would be a boy or a girl. Hopefully a boy. I smiled. I once again pictured her holding our baby. She would be a wonderful mother. I drove around

for about 2 hours, before making my way back to the farm. I hoped Jude would go for the idea. If she didn't, then I was going to drug her and carry her to the alter. But either way

this was the only way I could see this situation turning out even slightly ok. When I entered the bedroom she was already awake. She was sitting against the headboard. She turned

and looked at me, she smiled. Well that was a good sign. "Tommy, there's something I think you should know." That scared me a little. I sat down beside her and nodded my head

for her to continue. "I'm not sure how you feel about this, or what you're thinking right now, but I know that I am not giving up this child." I let out a deep breath. I knew she would

want to keep it. I was about to say something when she stopped me. "I'm not sure what your intentions are now, and I have no idea what the consequences of this will be, but in an

odd kind of way. I'm excited. Tommy I want this baby. Our baby." I could hear the excitement in her voice. I smiled and looked at her. I couldn't help it. I pressed my lips to hers.

She was surprised to say the least. But she quickly responded to the kiss. I pulled away before things got to serious. I rested my head against hers. "You want to know my

intentions Jude?" I asked. She nodded her head. "I love you more than anything. And like you said, as odd as it is, I'm excited about his baby to, I want it. And I want you. For the

rest of my life I want you." She squealed in delight and jumped into my lap. Pressing me against the bed, she climbed over me, straddling my hips. I looked into her eyes. I could tell

she was happy. She was glowing. It was the glow only a new mother could obtain. I raised up into a sitting position and kissed her softly. I pulled her into a hug and whispered in

her ear. "Marry me Jude."


End file.
